Albert Ellis Quotes

I get people to truly accept themselves unconditionally, whether or not their therapist or anyone loves them.

People could rationally decide that prolonged relationships take up too much time and effort and that they'd much rather do other kinds of things. But most people are afraid of rejection.

People don't just get upset. They contribute to their upsetness.

By not caring too much about what people think, I'm able to think for myself and propagate ideas which are very often unpopular. And I succeed.

For that again, is what all manner of religion essentially is: childish dependency.

Freud had a gene for inefficiency, and I think I have a gene for efficiency.

Acceptance is not love. You love a person because he or she has lovable traits, but you accept everybody just because they're alive and human.

As a result of my philosophy, I wasn't even upset about Hitler. I was willing to go to war to knock him off, but I didn't hate him. I hated what he was doing.

People got insights into what was bothering them, but they hardly did a damn thing to change.

People have motives and thoughts of which they are unaware.

Rational beliefs bring us closer to getting good results in the real world.

Self-esteem is the greatest sickness known to man or woman because it's conditional.

The art of love is largely the art of persistence.

The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.

There are three musts that hold us back: I must do well. You must treat me well. And the world must be easy.

There's no evidence whatsoever that men are more rational than women. Both sexes seem to be equally irrational.

We teach people that they upset themselves. We can't change the past, so we change how people are thinking, feeling and behaving today.

You largely constructed your depression. It wasn't given to you. Therefore, you can deconstruct it.

I had a great many sex and love cases where people were absolutely devastated when somebody with whom they were compulsively in love didn't love them back. They were killing themselves with anxiety and depression.

I had used eclectic therapy and behavior therapy on myself at the age of 19 to get over my fear of public speaking and of approaching young women in public.

I hope to die in the saddle seat.

I started to call myself a rational therapist in 1955; later I used the term rational emotive. Now I call myself a rational emotive behavior therapist.

I think it's unfair, but they have the right as fallible, screwed-up humans to be unfair; that's the human condition.

I think the future of psychotherapy and psychology is in the school system. We need to teach every child how to rarely seriously disturb himself or herself and how to overcome disturbance when it occurs.

I thought foolishly that Freudian psychoanalysis was deeper and more intensive than other, more directive forms of therapy, so I was trained in it and practiced it.