Yeah, we made a bet. I lost the bet. I lost the bet.
Why do you think I'll play football again?
But that has nothing to do with... well, I guess it does. That is the reason that I did come back.
I was sitting at home last night and thinking if there was anywhere in the world I'd rather be, or anything I'd rather be doing (than playing football).
And the answer was there was nothing.
Lunch or dinner? Well, I work, so I'll say dinner, ... I have a job now.
I realized a while back that I have an innate ability to be compassionate, and I saw that the strength of compassion is something that healers have and healers use.'.
I loved playing football, but the reasons I loved football were just to feed my ego. And any time you feed your ego, it's a one-way street. There were so many things I had to deal with that erased the positives I got from playing the game that it wasn't worth it. It's like eating a Big Mac and drinking a Diet Coke.
I've had a lot of clouds in my life since I got into pro football -- too many -- but now I feel like I can see really clearly for the first time. And I can see the Super Bowl from here.
I'm a beast in the second half. . . .
The biggest plus for me is I'm coming into a situation where they already have a good team. They're just adding a good player. I'm going to be surrounded with talent. I'm not going to feel like it's my job to win games. I just have to do my part.
This is the ultimate team game, but I make everyone else on my team better by making myself better.
The biggest thing is I'm going to a place where we're going to win right away, and I'm going to be a part of that. That's all you can really ask for.
The problem wasn't with the city, the sport, my teammates or my coach, even though I blamed all of them at one time or another. The problem was with me. But I didn't realize it back then because I hadn't been told that there was a clinical reason -- social anxiety disorder -- for everything odd I was feeling, everything from the depression to the shyness. I didn't understand that some of the things that were holding me back were chemical.
After getting my blood tested and having a nutritionist show me exactly which foods work best as fuel for me, I can feel the machine working efficiently, my body grabbing at the food after workouts.
I've always been shy, but in New Orleans there were times my shyness would cause me actual physical pain. I'd get so claustrophobic around people that I'd bend over from the sickness in my stomach. That's not a good way to be when you're famous, obviously.
This is my time. A door has swung open. You haven't seen the best of me yet.
I have neighbors, I have friends, and now I have to pick up and go. It's the off-season. I don't have to be here right now but I choose to. It's going to be hard to have to transplant somewhere else.
One of the biggest things I've done is learn how to love myself, flaws and all. Even the things I don't like about myself, I accept. People have made fun of me and made me self-conscious about talking so softly, for example, but I accept that as who I am and I'm not changing it for anybody. I'm at peace with who I am now, and once you've achieved that, all the other stuff disappears.
My confidence got beat up pretty badly, and you can't lead without confidence. You almost have to be overconfident to lead, but when my body broke down, the rest of me did, too . . .
What's fun is how laid-back everything is. It's always great to get in the end zone, but it's especially great to do it against the best players in the world with millions of people watching.
To get more out of yourself, you have to expect more out of yourself. Before your body can achieve it, your mind has to perceive it.
I really don't have an expectation. I found that expectations really get in the way. I don't make that choice. I don't decide how many carries I will have, therefore it's pointless for me to have expectations about it.
I guess I haven't earned his respect yet, ... He feels like I have to earn it. That's something I can understand. I'm definitely looking forward to him calling me that.
realizes that happiness doesn't come from the outside.