Life is wasted on the living.
Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.
It is known that there are an infinte number of worlds, simply because there is an infinite amount of space for them to be in. However, not every one of them is inhabited. Any finite number divided by infinity is as near nothing as makes no odds, so the average population of all the planets in the Universe can be said to be zero. From this it follows that the population of the whole Universe is also zero, and that any people you may meet from time to time are merely products of a deranged imagination.
Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.
I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons.
In order to fly, all one must do is simply miss the ground.
You live and learn. At any rate, you live.
Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too?
It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.
It is a rare mind indeed that can render the hitherto non-existent blindingly obvious. The cry 'I could have thought of that' is a very popular and misleading one, for the fact is that they didn't, and a very significant and revealing fact it is too.
It is a well-known fact that those people who must want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it... anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.
In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.
If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.
If somebody thinks they're a hedgehog, presumably you just give 'em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves.
I seldom end up where I wanted to go, but almost always end up where I need to be.
I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge?
A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.
Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.
For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.
He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.
He was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher... or, as his wife would have it, an idiot.
Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.
I don't believe it. Prove it to me and I still won't believe it.
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.