Funny Quotes

Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.

I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.

From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.

I think it's funny, because it just goes to show how much people think they really know but they really don't have a clue what they're talking about.

People say funny things all the time during really serious moments in life.

It's hard to be funny when you have to be clean.

All these jokes have been pre-approved as funny by me.

If you're going to tell people the truth, be funny or they'll kill you.

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to someone else.

When you're out of sight for as long as I was, there's a funny feeling of betrayal that comes over people when they see you again.

I'm so tired, but I can't sleep...standing on the edge of something much too deep...funny how I feel so much but cannot say a word...we are screaming inside, oh, but we can't be heard...so afraid to love you, more afraid to lose...clinging to a past.

I've nothing funny to say, but thank you.

It's only funny till someone gets hurt........then it's hilarious.

He's an English teacher. He thought it was pretty funny. We kind of laughed at him, not at the joke. He's always trying to loosen us up, and it helped us.

In hindsight, it's funny, ... At the time, it was like, 'Oh no, not again.'.

It's funny what a picture can do.

It's funny with Michael ... in his first book I was his mentor and in the second I had become his tormentor.

She's very family-oriented. She's basically a happy kid, a good kid. She's fun; she's funny; she's smart as a whip. I'm very worried about her.

I never burn anybody because I know exactly what I'm doing. I've never had any tragedies. I had something funny happen, though. One customer saved the wax and made a necklace out of it.

I made a supreme effort not to do that thing that parents do, which is to bore people without children to death by going on and on about how funny their children are, so there's none of that hopefully.

I got attention by being funny at school, pretending to be retarded, and jumping around with a deformed hand.

A lot of the tabloid stories are written so well, they're very clever and very funny. But you have to focus on what's really important and not read them - don't dive into it and don't get caught up in it.

It's a funny thing that when a man hasn't anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married.

It's funny, because my last record was a lot about isolation and people living in separate worlds that other people can't even understand, which drug addiction is the perfect negative example of.

Being funny is one of my greatest strengths. I can make girls smile when they're down, and when they're having a good time, I can carry on the joke.